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Monday, 01 December 2008
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First day of work today. Tiring and fairly uneventful.------------
While watching the television today, my mind soared and fluttered around. I could not focus. I loathe this feeling of deep jealousy. Jealousy makes one ugly, jealousy means envy, jealousy is probably under one of the seven deadly sins.
As the colorful images flashed past my eyes, my mind does not register any of the overly happy advertisements or screen shots of upcoming shows. I pondered whether a barrier to block out all emotions was necessary, whether everything is better as friends. Tonight I shall make this decision. To forget or not to forget this certain someone who has entered your life and stamped out his/her footprints in your mind.
Saturday, 29 November 2008
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How did we get here
So,
I'm back to xanga. (I shall leave out all the "it's been a long time blah blah")
Here's a short update on my life. The (dreaded) O'levels are finally over, I found a part-time temporary job, playing in a band no chocolates for me, am happy living in my obscure little life but not contented as I want so many material things. If only I could land a job that pays like, 1k a month. Yeah, dream on cheryl dream on.
"It's our own actions that define our lives, not the actions of others." How true.
Love,
Cheryl
Tuesday, 15 July 2008
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Currently Listening
In Love With A Girl
see related15.o9
But there's nothing like the warmth of the one
who has put in the time and you know he's gonna be there.
Gavin DeGraw sounds awesome. Totally. Chariot's not bad too.
Had our O'level listening paper today. To think I fell asleep at the beginning. I sure felt pure gratitude to Yt who gave my chair a hard kick to wake me up.
Today's really the last,
Before solitude.
Before I let my reclusive self take over.
I'm not sad. Just reluctant.
Mr. Loved by me,
You took my breath away.
I pray,
In your memory I won't fade away.
Love,
Cheryl
Monday, 14 July 2008
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14.o7
My mind runs amok
like cigarette smoke.
My thoughts float away
not knowing the way.
I hate school. Like, totally! Except for the company and perhaps how time seem to pass really fast. Today went past in a blur. Everything seem so fuzzy now. I really ought to be studying. But I'm just sitting around, chilling out by the poolside with good friends. Fuck life. Why must we experience stress and all the emotions that comes along with it.
Love,
Cheryl
Sunday, 13 July 2008
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Currently, I'm feeling intense guilt and frustration. About school, about my family. If only we could live in a vacuum. Where voices cannot be heard. I keep procrastinating when I really should start studying. My grades are slipping and so is moral. I foresee my failure and all that would come along with it. I'm worn-out, exhausted, drained, stretched. Tired. Sick.
I do not mean to sound like sucha pessimist but that's what I really feel. I feel frustration at how parent, or adults, can never seem to understand how we feel. It's a cliche but it's true. They claim we don't communicate. But let's get this clear, communication is a two-way thing. Just like how it takes two palms to clap. I feel sick of myself that my productivity level has fallen. I expect so much more.
Fuck it.
Cheryl
endpainelegantly
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- Name: Cheryl
- Gender: Female
- Member Since: 12/2/2007
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